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MR. KEYNOTE SPEAKER  

(to the tune of "Mr. Tambourine Man" by Bob Dylan)

CHORUS:

Hey Mister Keynote Speaker
Who invited you?
What a silly thing to do
I guess it must have been that crazy Kerrie

Hey Mister Keynote Speaker
We're in quite a bind
Can we still change our mind?
The thought of you presenting is quite scary

VERSE #1:

To get here for this meeting
We've all traveled very far
By plane or train or car
You may think that you're the star
But that's not who you are
You're just a name they happened to write down

By the time we read the program, and finally saw your name
We wondered why we came
It wasn't for your fame
We've got ourselves to blame
Our reading skills are lame
The pages looked the same
Your talks are like the ravings of a clown

<CHORUS>

<harmonica solo>

VERSE #2:

Though you might think we're all standing 'round
And waiting for your show
We'd have to answer no
We didn't want to go
Our reaction was too slow
We didn't see ya hiding 'round the bend

And now that you've been spotted
The door's too far away
The chairs are in the way
I guess we'll have to stay
What do you have to say?
This lecture takes all day
We just can't wait for it to finally end

<CHORUS>

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WHAT A BAYESIAN WORLD

(to the tune of "What a Wonderful World" by Louis Armstrong)

I want A given B
But know B given A
So I flip it around
The other way
And I think to myself
What a Bayesian world!

I know what I know
Then see what I see
And update my thoughts
Conditionally
And I think to myself
What a Bayesian world!

BRIDGE:

I go for a walk
And feel the sun's rays
Everyone smiles
Sayin', "I love Bayes"

Yes I form opinions
From the data, it's true
But I had opinions
Before that, too

<trumpet solo>

<keyboard solo>

<repeat BRIDGE>

I take the probability
Of A intersect B
And divide by P
Of all of B
And I think to myself
What a Bayesian world!

Yes I think to myself
What a Bayesian world!

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